is everything such a goddamn hustle/hassle/bitch?

I'm fine, don't worry, I just feel like I've been pushing things uphill for awhile, and I don't see too clear of an end in sight.

I just applied for more information into Savannah College of Art & Design's Professional Writing MFA program. I'm not nipping off back to school just yet, even considering the huge financial undertaking I'd have to manage on my own (my parents stopped paying for college three years int to undergrad) makes me cringe, but I would like to go back part time, while working somewhere (hopefully in the editorial field) full-time.

And Savannah, well...just because. Close to the beach, steeped in history, always warm. Art School so Brian has career opportunities. On a lighter note, you can take your alcoholic drinks from bars TO GO. I'm applying for jobs down there right now, which isn't doing much for my NEED TO GTFO of midwest attitude.

So much depends
On the plastic spoon now frozen hard into last night's ice cream
Haven't eaten all day, tug, lick, tug, lick.
Aw, forget the spoon.

Since writing this, I'm happy to report the spoon has broken free!

Around 11am I started having this weird black spot in my vision, and it's still here. I went to the mirror and tried to see if anything was in my eye or if my cornea was scratched. Then I did what all of us have done at least once before: the "dear god, am I dying" google search

"These black spots or "floaters" that you're experiencing are nothing more than dead blood cells that have banded together and are causing a shadow like dot to float around in your vision. When they disappear for awhile, this is because you've managed to move it into a position out of your field of vision.
There's really nothing you can do about it besides put up with it. They're caused mostly from major stress, lack of sleep, extended drug use or severe head trauma far as I know?"

I hope that's what it is :-/

Relax, I'm not going down the aisle anytime soon; definitely ready for a few more adventures as a girlfriend before that. However, my favorite redhead is getting ready to take the plunge (and if you don't know the fiance, let me just tell you these two are perfect together, and I'm very excited for them) and watching her plan from very far away–we talk on the phone occasionally and through gchat a lot!–has sparked my interest in learning all I can about weddings, from what goes into planning them, what different cultures do for the special day, traditional Western world bridal etiquette and where it stems from, to commentary and social discussion about the Wedding Industry at large.

I tell ya what, there's enough stuff out there to fodder a William and Mary freshman seminar–don't know if it would be very popular though, because when I was nineteen,  the idea of a wedding sounded off a death knell in my mind.

Here are some links to some of my research:

Engagement rings- Tiffany & Co. allows you to "bookmark" several styles of rings and email them to yourself or a friend (or a guy, I guess, if you're really tacky and desperate). I find myself shying away from the big honkin solitaires, but they definitely have some beautiful rings with smaller stones in cool shapes.

Indiebride- The site administrator fields questions from outraged, confused or exhausted brides as they try to forge their way through weddings and their piles of excelsior. She also has interviews with scholars, authors and wedding experts, and publishes some interesting essays.

The idea of making your own invitations and centerpieces is enticing and sexy, though probably exhausting. Though very very cool to look at all the supplies you can use and how to use them.

Wedding coordinators- This Williamsburg-based wedding coordinator has a very engrossing, endearing blog. There's also a heated debate between current and former brides-to-be going on in the bowels of wedding site forums as to whether wedding coordinators are a unnecessary luxury (a "rip-off") or a neccessity if you want to actually enjoy being engaged and your own wedding.

And finally, currently reading One Perfect Day: The Selling of the American Wedding which looks at why the average wedding costs more than a mid-grade car or a down payment on a house, and why we want to think this is okay.

Oh, I also just want a chance to plug (as site administrator)


Still under construction of course, but it's getting there.

Watching the inauguration on a skippy/slow internet stream. With BK, and it's bringing out the worst DC snobbery in him, so I'll probably leave soon.

Launching my magazine this Friday. Very nervous about that.

Also bought this:


127 centimeters of pure awesomeness. And get your heads out of the gutter; it's a musical instrument.

woke up this morning with a slight sore throat and a little achiness.  ran to the drugstore and bought lots of echinacea and vitamin C, also airborne, because i know some people swear by it.

i'm still pissed off though.  i manage not to get sick all year until i come home to visit my family. when they're sick and i don't want to touch them, i get chastised for being cold and bitchy.  even so, they make it pretty hard to avoid it, like when my sick little sister touched all the ice cubes in the freezer when she got a drink.

however, this is my last night i have to spend in the house, the last night i have to be driven crazy by all the sick people, their messes and their fight picking. i love them to death, but goodness gracious, i think this marks the very last holiday visit when i actually spend the night!  if at all financially possible i will be getting a hotel room from now on; it will definitely make visits less strained and more pleasant for all.

in other news i made my homemade mac cheese and a spinach and apple salad for dinner for my fam tonight, with warm crumbled bacon on top of the salad for the meat-eaters.  it was a hit!

We have so much food in the fridge I'm going to be baking a LOT of muffins this weekend for freezing them/giving them away as gifts and we're having scrambled eggs for dinner a lot.  Maybe tonight I'll make fried egg sandwiches, to mix it up a bit, because we also have a lot of bread (egg challah bread is now my new favorite; I'm rye'd out).  Last night we had quinoa, black beans and scrambled eggs, and, while the quinoa stunk while it was cooking, it actually worked well with the eggs.  And it tastes better the next day!  I brought some for lunch.

I have two zucchinis I bought on a whim that I don't know what to do with though.  Zucchini muffins?

Can't wait to go to Chez Trinh again.  There's a slight possibility I'll be in Williamsburg on New Years Eve!

In other news, Mob Wars on facebook was the worst thing that ever happened to my productivity.  Ever.

nurselady:  hold still, or i'll never get these drops in!
me:  nrrrgh! (squirm)
nurse: whatsa matter with you?  you wear contacts so you should be used to this (while saying this, her long nails are digging into the soft skin of my eyelid and under-eye to try and keep my eye open)
me:  this is just like clockwork orange! (flail)
nurse: 'scuse me?!
me:  nevermind!  just do the drops!

boy, at first i was glad to be getting out of work for a few hours to get checked out for pink eye, but it turned out to be such a fucken ordeal and a $40 copay that I would have gladly just sucked it up at work with an itchy eye to avoid it!

that sadistic nurse gave me a prescription for drops but i was so bitter about the whole thing i never filled it.  i went home and took two benadryls.  today my eye is looking much better.

btw:  benadryl + 1 glass white wine = being clubbed with a big sleeping bat.

Who else  was  verklempt  last night?
I was deeply moved to see the crowd at Grant park, Mccain's gracious speech, and Obama's uplifting one.  I drifted off to sleep once the talking heads started up though.

Really trying to lift my mood, because I don't want to go to sleep distraught.  Chocolate?  check.  Scented candle? check.  Kiss and cuddle with one of the gerbies?  check.
Too bad all the peanut butter cups are gone.  Mr. "I'm allergic to nuts" had to eat the last one.
Oh, who am I kidding.  I ate all the other ones.

I have very little to be upset about now.  Except that I'm poor and don't get to see BK half as often as I'd like.  I just get on these emotional jags.

Excited about tomorrow!  Mr. O's face is on the back of my Vespa!

Wish I had gotten the gardasil vaccine this summer.  It takes six months for all three courses, and I just spoke with my ob-gyn and they CAN'T bill me for all three shots right now, which means they won't be covered through my insurance. 

Thankfully, the dentist is going to squeeze me in a little early, though.  I'm wondering if I should get my eyes checked too.

This health insurance is the only thing I'm going to miss about this fracking job. I wonder if I can buy like 3 or 4 months worth of my birth control at once.  I think it's twice as expensive once I'm off the insurance.

In better news:  INTERNSHIP INTERVIEW TOMORROW 
update:  spent a good half of the night playing this:

1. Steam cleaned all the carpets
2. Put the gerbies on lockdown except when holding them/letting them run around in balls in the kitchen
3. Cleaning gerbs tanks out once a week
4. true HEPA filters on all the heating vents
5. Big honkin air filter with a true HEPA filter ordered, will arrive next week
6. Buying a Dyson with a true HEPA, which apparently puts most vacuums to shame
7. Down feather duvet gone (RIP) replaced with cotton bedspread
8. Bedroom door kept closed, as well as bathroom door
9. Bedding washed once a week, buying special "allergen" laundry detergent
10. Brian's side effect-riddled steroid inhaler.

Keep your fingers crossed that this kicks BK's allergies outta the water!
We are slowly becoming the boy and girl in the bubble.

All right if you haven't seen the Project Runway finale, and care, stop reading right now!
( Read more... )

I haven't been on here in ages.  For the last couple of months I've been using LJ mostly to post snarky comments on the Australia's Next Top Model community LJ (yeah, I know, but I live in the midwest; I'm allowed to do lame things).

A lot seems to have happened to everyone.  With both the good and the bad, golly, I wish I had been there to talk to you in person about it at the Leafe or the Caf or the J-House lounge.  Funny–when I left school I was so anxious to go, because it felt like I was just doing too much.  Now I feel like I didn't do enough, at least when it came to friends.

A quick update on me:
-everything in personal life is copacetic. 
-i've been made a moderator on a forum i've been on for ages (laugh if you must, but i was soooo stoked about this)
-managing editor of Cultureweek–that's still going well.  Co-editor and I are thinking of completely taking over, but more on that later
-copy editor of The Robin.  Great little student satire publication.  I love helping out.
-schmoozing two publications in Indianapolis in the hopes of scoring an internship next semester
and finally
-quit my awful job!  I'm working 'til December, then I'm outta there.  With any luck, I'll have an internship to keep up the "professional" resume and get a nightjob bartending or waitressing somewhere (I'm 90% sure I'll get offered at least one internship).  Was it risky?  Yes.  Well thought out?  Not really.  Best decision I ever made to preserve sanity, sense of self and esteem?  Absofuckinglutely.

Oh, and you knew about these guys, right?

I trotted into Freshman year at a sprightly 108 pounds.  Over the course of 4 years I went up and down, but left with a  weight of about 120... I was okay with that because everyone warns you about the "freshman 15" and you know, I was changing from a girl to a woman, whatever. I liked the way I looked at the end of college.

But what's the deal now?  I didn't think I'd put on weight AFTER college; if anything, I don't drink half as much, nor do I eat cafeteria food anymore...barely a year out of college and I'm six pounds heavier.

Has this happened to anyone else?  I need to get back down to 120 before I'm expected to wear a bathing suit this July.  Seriously.

I just got a partially impacted wisdom taken out in March. The pills were loads of fun, but the pain after the local shot wore off and the huge hole in my mouth for a few weeks was no party. Not to mention being fully conscious and hearing the sickening cracks in my skull when they were extracting it made me squeal during surgery and scare a bunch of  dds students; fairly traumatizing for me.

Oral surgeon dude assessed my other teeth, and said there's no reason for the top wisdoms to come out; I can still get braces and those won't affect it, and my bottom right wisdom was about a year behind the one I was getting out. In other words, I could expect to have the same surgery for the other tooth in March 2009. I was cool with that.

I woke up this morning with a sore jaw, and I noticed having that weird twingy headache I had gotten when my other tooth was coming in (scared me something awful, but I realized it was just my trigeminal nerve  getting irritated or something by the erupting tooth.)

 I checked my gums in the mirror tonight, and sure enough, I see bits of new white tooth coming in behind my very back molar on the right side.  Almost a full year before Tooth Genius told me it would.

Curse me and my overachieving teeth. 

Democratic voting thingy is in 5 days here in IN. I didn't register in time to vote in this, but I'll be ready in November.

It's almost May, for fuck's sake!